American Music in China and Cave

A nasty rumor has been floating around the internet that I bought "Hollaback Girl" and "My Humps" off itunes yesterday. I have no comment. Actually I plead the fifth. I did hear "My Humps" blasting from a scooter that drove by me on the street. Which is probably why I bought that song; if I indeed did.

American music in China. The people over here only know sucky American songs ("California Hotel", "Country Roads" and "We Will Rock You" excluded). Were talking Celine Dion, Backstreet Boys, and Whitney Houston. They love these people, and they will ask you to sing their songs a capella in front of crowds of fifty or sixty people like you get paid to sing for a living. That gets old realll quick. I mean, do I look like Celine Dion? Would I go up to a girl and ask her to sing Johnny Cash, expect her to do a good job, and expect her to know all the words to all his songs? Absolutely not, if she could pull that off the next thing I would ask would be her hand in marriage. And of course they ask "Have you ever heard of (insert artist name)" And I got so tired of replying "Actually when Backstreet Boys came out I was in Middle School. All my friends and I thought they were a bunch of homo-corporate tools, we hated them. They can't sing, can't play an instruments, can't write music, and probably have the combined musical iq of Paris Hilton," that I've started to reply (to my extreme shame) "Yea I love the Backstreet Boys! JT? I love that guy!" (Actually I think he was in nsync, but is anybody going to pretend they know enough about this stuff to contradict me? Didn't think so). You remember when JT and Britney were a thing? That was a weird time. I mean that's one of those relationships that seemed like it never happened. Now JT has brought sexy back and Britney is so busy increasing everyone's self-esteem via the VMA's that she's lost custody of both her children to Kevin Federline? Someone has to do something. We can't claim to be decent people and let such atrocities go on in this world. Ladies and gentleman, I would give up the rest of my life to raise those kids, but I'm in China and my hands are tied. In fact, there about two years behind the pop culture times over here. Everyone thinks that Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston are still together. Seriously.

Man, I need to get out.

Where was I? Yea, so everyone over here likes sucky music. And hold on to your seats, no one has heard of the Beatles. Much less Led Zeppelin, Dylan, the Rolling Stones, Limp Bizkit, Janis, Hendrix, Simon and Garfunkel, AC/DC, the Grateful Dead, Pink Floyd, Neil Young, take it wherever you want it. However, like I said earlier, they do know one good song from John Denver, The Eagles, and Queen. Of course it's the three songs that get played so many times that you want to rip the radio out of the car whenever you hear them, but beggars can't be choosers. I'll quit.

Yesterday Haley and I travelled two hours to one of the largest cavern's in the eastern world. We kept hearing that this cave is "The Largest Cave in the World" from everyone that wasn't caucasian. Granted, it was a quite impressive sight, but I don't think it's the largest cave in the world. I kept wanting to say "Can you show me international academic journal that has published the scientific evidence proving this claim?" but instead I just said "The Largest Cave in the World? SWEET!" And I can understand why they would say this, here is a picture of the entrance



This--according to a website that is not Chinese--is the second largest cave entrance in the world. It's about 300 ft. high. The cave continues this way for about a two miles into the mountain. Pretty impressive, and if I had a vote, I would say it's the largest cave in the world. But I have yet to see a website that substantiates these claims, and I'm pretty sure the experts have known about this thing for a while.

There's not much to say about a cave. Have you ever tried? "It was real pretty." That's about it. Man, "My Humps" is one awful song. Yet here I am listening to it.

"I'll see you in the morning if nothing happens"

p.s. I love the comments and keep them coming. It is a little difficult for me to view them though, since blogger is blocked over here. I do have a way of viewing them, but it is a fourteen step process that I rarely take the time to plow through. I will reply to them, just give me time.

p.s.s. I don't think Limp Bizkit is one of the greatest bands ever. I can't sleep at night knowing that someone might take my sarcasm as reality. In fact, one of the happiest days of my life is when Cristina Agueliera poned Fred Durst. Can't you believe that relationship almost happened? Wait a second. Never mind.